I am trying to be OKAY...
15, Sep 2014 23:37
2014, proved to be even more confusing than 2013. They say you get better as you aged, I say I feel lesser as I aged. Lesser as in less adequate. I feel that there are so many things I have absolutely no idea about. So, I left my job end of June, went to London for 2 months. As of now, I feel nothing regarding my trip. I was alone most of the time, I met people but not what I intended. That's why it is always best to be alone. People, too much of them in your life confuses what you really need to do. Because of people, I lost focus in London. I didn't really learn to be alone as I want to. I wasn't myself and I hated that. Maybe the ultimate lesson is - always love yourself first before you start to love someone. If you are unhappy with yourself, you can get no where really. You are the one who can save yourself, that's it.
Now, I am jobless, not enjoying doing nothing because at this moment I am such an ungrateful brate. The universe has been kind enough to bless me with health, a little bit of wealth so that I can remain jobless at no hurry to find a job and even some looks at my age - I should be contented and count my blessings.
Remember, if you don't keep trying, you will never open the right door. If you don't clear bullshit, it will always be stuck at your front door.
THIS TOO SHALL PASS.